


because i love you | bertholdt hoover x reader

by pishu



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: 104th Training Corps - Freeform, Angst, Crying, Fluff, Morally Ambiguous Character, Multi, Reminiscing, Spoilers, aot s3 spoilers, i’m sorry armin, i’m sorry scouts, reader saves bertholdt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-17 10:48:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,237
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29099085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pishu/pseuds/pishu
Summary: aot s3 part two spoilers aheadhearing bertholdt calling out for help hurt me so i wrote about saving himgender neutral reader :)
Relationships: Bertolt Hoover & Reader, Bertolt Hoover/Reader, Bertolt Hoover/You
Comments: 13
Kudos: 60





	because i love you | bertholdt hoover x reader

**Author's Note:**

> interactive fics  
> y/n - your name

If you do this, you’ll be a traitor. You have to think it through. What happens next?

In front of you lies a syringe with the Titan serum, a charred Armin Arlert, and a dismembered Bertholdt Hoover. You know what the plan is. You knew that this outcome was a possibility when the Scouts first acquired the liquid. You thought you had accepted this, but now that it’s happening, you couldn’t.

You knew you couldn’t bear to watch the love of your life get eaten by a titan. 

So now what? How could you save Bertholdt? Was there any way to do that safely? Armin was one of your closest friends, as well— you didn’t want him to die, either. But, in the end, you would always side with Bertholdt. Your heart knew as such, but it was a hard realization. After all, he is the Colossal Titan.

The Colossal Titan that broke Wall Maria. The giant that killed thousands. The being that led to the downfall of living in the walls. That was all Bertholdt Hoover.

But, he was also your lover. The man who was too shy to talk to you at first; who got flustered when you started a conversation. The man who was always around, as if he was protecting you from harm. The man who helped you train and land a spot in the top 10; but accepted your choice to join the Scouts, and followed suit.

The man who would always help you during training; who would sneak out after lights out to go see you. The man who would smile at the sight of you and fill with happiness every time he made you laugh. The man who was blushing like crazy after he asked you out; who was thrilled when you reciprocated his feelings. 

Bertholdt Hoover, the man you had your first kiss with. It was short, but sweet. Full of emotion. The man who kissed you almost nonstop after the initial one— forehead kisses were his favorite. The man you lost your virginity to.

The surprisingly affectionate man, given his shyness.

The man who loved you. The man you loved.

You could never truly hate him, even after what he did. Did you forgive him? No. How could you? He sent humanity into chaos. Hell, he was a monster. But, he was still _Bertholdt_ , the man who had your heart.

You weren’t ready to say goodbye. You just _couldn’t_. Not yet.

You watched as Levi took the syringe out of the case and moved over to where the burnt boy laid. It pained you to see him like that. However, it would crush you even more to see him as a titan, eating the man you loved.

The others on the roof were intensely focused on the captain and were paying no mind to you. Your next actions would hurt like hell, but you couldn’t sit and do nothing.

You shifted to get up. You didn’t actually know what you were planning to do, but before you could even think of anything, you feel a cold, small hand on your wrist.

“Stop.” Mikasa sternly whispered. “...I know this is hard, since you...have feelings for Bertholdt, but this has to happen. You know it does.”

You sadly nodded.

Of course, you knew that. But you weren’t going to accept it. 

You made the decision that Armin was going to die today. You had absolutely no right to make that decision, but you did.

Armin would have to die as a titan. As sick as the thought of your comrades having to kill him as a titan made you, you just had to do it.

You and your fellow scouts watched as Levi injected the serum into the once blond boy, pushed him off the roof, and waited for it to take effect. You teared up, as you knew this would be the last time you could sit with the Scouts, united. 

You found yourself reflecting on your time in the 104th Cadet Corps. Training with the others, practicing combat skills. You happened to be the most efficient with the ODM gear— in a race, you’d win by a landslide.

You remembered sitting in the dining hall, laughing at a joke Connie made or trying to hold Sasha back from a cut of meat. Talking with your roommates about your past and hopeful future. Graduating, joining the Scouts, and getting the chance to join the Special Operations Squad with your best friends. Getting your first titan kill. Going on missions.

Hopeful that humanity could one day beat the titans.

The Scouts were there for you when Bertholdt and Reiner were revealed as the Colossal and Armored Titans. Your friends comforted you as you cried and screamed with anger and betrayal. 

You were part of a family, and it would be over because of your selfish decision. 

Everyone on the roof watched as Armin turned from human to titan. Seeing Armin in that state filled you with sadness. 

‘I’m sorry.’ You thought.

‘I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.’

The giant blond creature stomped over to the building Bertholdt was lying on. It looked like he had just woken up. You winced as the large, skinny hand grabbed onto the man you loved.

Bertholdt was frantic in his attempts to escape the titan’s grasp, failing due to his lack of limbs. You made eye contact with your terrified lover.

“Guys! Help me!” Bertholdt pleaded.

“I’m so, so sorry,” You whispered, crying.

You chose Bertholdt.

Before anyone could register what was happening, the sound of cables shooting filled the area. Tears in your eyes, you rushed over, grabbed Bertholdt, and made your way over the wall.

You used your gift with ODM to your gross advantage. Somehow, you still had some gas left, and you knew that everyone else was out. You were disgusted with yourself, but...you still had Bertholdt. That meant everything to you.

Your limbless lover was on your side, arm wrapped around him. It was uncomfortable, but it worked. You maneuvered to a forest with high trees. After finding the most elevated one to avoid titans, you sat down and laid Bertholdt on your lap.

Bertholdt was, to say it simply, shocked. You saved him.

“...Why? Why would you do that, Y/N?”

Good question. Why did you do that?

You knew that the chance of you succeeding was slim, even though you were fast. There were many corpses around from the encounter with the Beast Titan; there has to be some usable gas canisters. So, why?

Maybe it was because you couldn’t say goodbye to Bertholdt’s hugs and kisses. Perhaps you couldn’t part with his adorable laugh or weird sleeping positions; or how he was always protective of you. Maybe you just wanted more time— even a small amount of it— with him. You thought of every little reason, but it all amounted to one.

You moved your lover’s now disheveled bangs out of his face, looked down into his soft green eyes, and kissed his forehead. 

“...Because I love you, Bertholdt.”

The black-haired boy gazed at you with pure admiration and sadness. You sacrificed your life as you know it for _him_. You didn’t know anything about Marley, the Warrior program, or his situation...but you risked everything to save him. Tears filled his eyes as he softly smiled.

“I love you too, Y/N. Thank you.”

**Author's Note:**

> did armin and the scouts dirty with this one 
> 
> tried something a little different with my writing style, sorry if it was repetitive  
>   
> hope you enjoyed :)


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